The Year of Piesquare

Year 2008 has been wonderful.  It kicked off with me getting pregnant, the second time around.

It was a year full of Stefan and only Stefan,

Until they become three.

Lots of snow - sucks! 

Four seasons in maternity clothes sucks, too!

And because I was pregnant and breastfeeding, it was a whole year of abstinence from sashimi, that even this bracelet looked yummy to me.

Stefan was finally potty trained.  Better late than never!

We saw a dentist for the first time in Canada, and were charged a whopping $800+ for basic services.  Napakasakit, Kuya Eddie!

But thankfully, this year I became full-time at Citi, so most of it were covered.  Double yipee! 

I kicked off my year-long mat leave a few weeks before my due date. I miss Citi but I’m enjoying my time off with my boys.

‘Twas no sawa to Joshua Radin, a sudden liking to Beyonce, and Britney Spears’ releases. Gimme, gimme… 

Another year never missing Prison Break and Desperate Housewives, and a lot of laugh and dance with Ellen De Generes.

Seeing all of Michael Phelp’s gold medal wins in this year’s Beijing Olympics and got these over-hyped glasses from McDo.

How could I forget - the mesmerizing Beijing 2008 Opening, too.

 

 

Saw Dark Knight in theater. What makes this noteworthy is because the last movie I saw on theater was 5 years ago.

 

At last, Richard Marx concert in Niagara.  It’s in Sherwin’s lifelist… don’t laugh.

 

 

Six straight days of shopping on Boxing week and more online shopping than I have ever done this year. 

 

Another year decorating, decluttering, and redecorating the house.

 

Not seeing my family again.  Boohoohoo!

 

On the other hand, my mom-in-law, sis-in-law and her husband were here for Struan’s birth.

 

And I got to visit Achi again,

 

And go to New York for the first time.

 

Had a relaxing break (as in break from household chores) in Blue Mountain,

 

And just around town.

 

Our first strawberry-picking experience.

 

A year of home-cooked meals,

 

Frequent take out of mostly Filipino dishes, which I eat with gusto, 

And our usual weekly eat-out.

Our birthdays.

 

 

Our first Christmas tree.

Holiday with friends.

 

 

Another year into Chuvaness, Babycenter, Ohdeedoh, PEP, Facebook, Multiply, etc.

 

And another year with you!

 

At the end of each year, I look back on the year that was in pictures, and review the 3 annual lists I come up with the previous year – My Wishlist, Targets, and Prayers.  It’s always good to visually see what I have accomplished for the year, from the annual routine, the must do’s, to the more specific goals.  It's lovely to see which items in my list I have bought or received, those that I’m going to wishlist again the next year, or those that only The Secret or Santa can give.  And it's always a blessing to realize answered prayers, and to accept that some things I have prayed for can wait.

 

This is what I do each year – I count my blessings and wish for a better new year - for me and for all.

Multitasking

 

It’s about 12 noon now.  It’s only a quarter of the day since I woke up and I am already exhausted.  I’m eating my lunch as I type so I am not wasting any time.  I am always in a hurry to finish my meals that I don’t get to enjoy most of them anymore, thinking Struan will be crying in no time for feeding, or changing, or for attention in general.  Speaking of him, he is crying now, for what I have yet to determine.  Pause.

 

I’m back.  Oops, he’s crying again.  Pause. 

 

I’m carrying him now as I type, while giddyapping my legs to make him stop crying, as I'm chewing that big spoonful of lamb and rice that I just shoved into my mouth, while the clothes are on the dryer and his bottles are being sterilized upstairs.  This is typical of my multi-tasking.

 

Everyday I go up and down the stairs – from top floor down to the den 35 steps to be exact, multiplied by the numerous trips I make going up and down each day, total of which I can only calculate with a pedometer.  Not to mention the weight involved, such as that laundry basket that I trudge with me, or those stout feeding bottles of Struan as much as my arms can embrace, or his rocker that I dangle up and down on my back, or Struan himself on one arm and something else on another.  I pass by each floor leaving no stones unturned on spaces I have to declutter, and articles I have to either bring up or down making sure there’s not an idle arm on one trip, that can save me for yet another.

 

Classical music is playing on all floors simultaneously all day because turning the players on and off would take seconds off my precious time.  The other day I have figured out how to manage Struan on one arm while typing with both hands, and just now the ability to take out clothes from the dryer with him on an arm, two more great discoveries added to an earlier one of being able to carry him and eat at the same also with both hands.  Such skills that I have to master to save even more time.  Time that I wish I can bank for myself for the end of the day.

 

But each day never seems to end and the chores seem never ending.  So I savour my every Kitkat break as much as I could, whether it’s an episode of Ellen or Oprah, Chuvaness or PEP, my blog or somebody else's, a fashion or home magz, an email to my family or IM with Sherwin, out shopping or online shopping, a scoop of Häagen Dazs or a piece of Swiss Delice (or a Kitkat, who knows).  Anything that will take me away from it all even just for a while, because longer than that is next to impossible. 

 

For the meantime, it's safe to say that mutitasking has become a talent.

 

Just Let Them Be

On one Babycenter.com article I was reading today, I came across a parent’s comment on why most parents think their child is gifted, which I find truly inspiring and timely in a competitive world we live in today, and I quote:

 

“I don't think parents who question other parent's assertion that their children are "gifted" are rude or juvenile. I think they are responding to a culture of competition and excess, one that does not spare children or even toddlers. I think some parents are so caught up in the wonder of their own children, are so separate from the wide range of child development and want so desperately to have an exceptional child, they will dance over hot coals to insist their Sally's off to Harvard at 2. Both my brother and I tested "gifted" in public school, both were sent to enrichment/gifted stream programs and we're both happy, well adjusted people with good jobs and great lives. Funny thing - both our parents are bright, articulate and interesting human beings with great parenting skills. And my child? Well. Master genius of the universe of course : )) Just keep reading, dancing, playing with bugs and going to galleries. Live your own fantastic, interesting, "gifted" life and right as rain, your little wonder will follow on beside you. I try to ignore most of this stuff, knowing from experience that the kids who make good at the end of the day are the kind ones, the ones that learned to play fairly with true joy and work hard. The ones who were flashcarded, pressured, driven nearly insane by activities, extra-curricular tutoring, language classes, dance recitals, music classes, drawing studios...well. They either rebelled and dropped out, became strangely average or ate their idiotic parents [who were]cooked in a divine wine reduction.”

 

Another parent wrote:

 

“Let me just say this - I was/am gifted. I suprised my mom one day by reading Dr. Suess Mulberry Street. But I have to say this to the "gifted toddler acceleration" debate. Let the kids be kids. You get such a short time in this world to be interested in the intricacies of flowers or the cracks in the sidewalk. Capitalize now on the fascinations that your child will soon be too old to really appreciate. Save the alphabet flash cards for later. That is what I will always thank my mother for - sharing the wonders of the world with me and sparking my exhuberant curiosity in all things. And believe me, you can't possibly be unqualified to teach any 16 month old. A 5 year old can teach a 16 month old, not the same things you will, but things you couldn't. Just enjoy your children. That will be what they would remember.”

 

As I would often say, “to each its own.”  Just let them be!

 

                                                                        *   *   *

On a parallel note…

 

Shortly after Stefan had established his routine on his first year, there were no cuddling and lulling necessary to make him sleep.  We were able to just put him down on his bed in his own room and he would fall asleep by himself.  These days, he wants somebody by his side until he falls asleep.  It bothered me for a while thinking that the discipline I have inculcated went down the drain just like that.  But now – what the heck – let him be!  I have sworn to just enjoy those moments in bed with him, talking about his day, making him fly with my legs, riding on his pretend bus, laughing, hugging and kissing, …

 

For he will be a kid only once in his life and mine.

 

 

Too Much Thomas

I knew Stefan has had too much of Thomas & Friends  when...

• during our pretend play, he'd often say Sherwin is Spencer, I am Edward, and he is always Gordon because he is the #4 engine, while he is turning 4 this month.
• some of his statements would end with a "snorted Gordon", or "puffed James", or "said Diesel", as if he's playing chamber theater
• he has adapted some British English into his vocabulary, like using "glum" and "cross" instead of sad and angry; and "despicable" for disgraceful.
• one of his favorite expressions now is "Pah!" and he says "Rubbish!" or "Bossy sprockets!"  
• he reads Thomas books a lot to the point that he can read them by himself. 
• he likes to do Thomas karaoke.
• the Thomas CD has to be played in the car whenever he's there.  If we don't play it, he'll say he will pretend it's still being played and he will sing them.
• he refuses to throw the leaflets that come with the toys even if they are torn and have been scotch-taped over and over.
• he knows that the Sights and Sounds set comes with a storage bench, and the Roundhouse Set comes in a Thomas storage box, and he says they are not the same.
• I asked him which story has used the words "pah", "rubbish" and "bossy sprockets", and he told me right away that those words were used in "Thomas and the Rumours", "James and the Trouble with Trees" and "Little Engines can do Big Things", and he even showed me the pages. 

Kinda eerie!  The good thing is he loves CARS too now, so it's not all Thomas anymore.

It's in the Air

After much debating, we have finally put up our Christmas tree.  We never put it up this early, after all it’s still November, and Stefan’s birthday is yet to come.  But this weekend was free, so we just decided to do it.  It’s just as timely as we saw this season’s first flurries after we went shopping for more Christmas tree ornaments in the afternoon.

 

Stefan enthusiastically helped decorate.

While the hubby insisted on a meaningful tree-topper - his Steve Nash.

 

Meanwhile, these songs are in my current playlist:

Angels Among Us - Alabama

The Christmas Shoes – Alabama

We are the Reason – Avalon

From a Distance (Christmas edition) – Bette Midler

The Prayer – Celine Dion & Andrea Bocelli

Believe (Polar Express) – Josh Groban

Christmas Canon in D – Trans-Siberian Orchestra

Kumukutikutitap – Ryan Cayabyab

Christmas in Our Hearts – Jose Mari Chan

When a Child is Born – Jose Mari Chan

A Perfect Christmas – Jose Mari Chan

The Jubilee Song – Jaimie Rivera

Tell the World of His Love – Jaimie Rivera

Pasko Na Sinta Ko – Gary Valenciano

Himig ng Pasko – Apo Hiking

Tanging Yaman – Carol Banawa & Bukas Palad Choir

 

50 in 5

 50 Things I have Lived Through and Lived By in 5 Years

 

1.        Making the right decision to emigrate (5 years today).

2.        Moved house 3 times.

3.        Failed and passed my driving test.

4.        Became citizens, which meant passing the citizenship test as well.

5.        Survive the long winter.  Brave the -30ْْْ˚C windchills.  Drive during winterstorm.

6.        Enjoy the short spring/summer season and make the most of it.

7.        Finding a job is timing, chance, luck and connection.

8.        Cook dishes I miss and ambitiously replicate Godging’s dishes.

9.        Buy if I can’t make them, as….

10.     Aphu would always remind me, to never scrimp on food.

11.     Eat lots of fruits, veggies, eat brown bread, brown pasta and brown rice, even if calrose is hard to resist.

12.     Drink skim milk daily, buy anything fat-free, sugar-free, caffeine-free, less sodium, half-the-fat and everything light, cos mahal magkasakit.

13.     Got over a miscarriage, 2 pregnancies, and accepted that nobody’s gonna patronize my cravings and aversions, so I had none.

14.     Assemble furnitures – sideboard, bed, shelves, computer table, tables and chairs.

15.     Appreciate our helpers back home, because....

16.     No matter how much I ignore that piece of garlic that fell on the kitchen floor, I will always end up having to clean it myself.

17.     Understand why Papa would often remind me to turn off the lights and the component before I leave my room.

18.     Save when you have to. Spend when you need to.  Splurge when you want to.

19.     Money can be earned again but opportunities may not come back, a valuable truth I’ve learned from my mother-in-law.

20.     Spend lots of time with my kid(s).  Cos with kids, the days are long but the years are short.

21.     Spend quality time with family. Go on vacations. Or just cuddle at home.

22.     Time is like a river.  You cannot touch the same water twice, because the flow that has passed will never pass again.

23.     Don’t neglect relationships, keep in touch with old friends, even while you make new ones.

24.     Greet people on their birthdays cos it makes them happy

25.     Thirst for knowledge. Read books or magazines, and news, health, parenting and lifestyle articles from the net. Also showbiz news and blogs.

26.     Respect the privacy and secrecy of others.

27.     Criticize less and mind my own business.

28.     An idle mind is the devil’s workplace.

29.     Immitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

30.     Life is not about keeping score or counting assets. 

31.     Learn to say no when you have to.

32.     Be truthful.  Don't get bitten by white lies, palusot, and exaggeration.

33.     Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not – Oprah.

34.     Sometimes it is okay to lose a little so as not to lose it all. That I’m allowed to be mad, but I can also choose not to get angry.

35.     Turn to jazz, instrumental or classical music.  Breath deeply.  Spend some alone time.

36.     Stop and smell the roses, admire the clouds, feel the breeze on your face, enjoy the aircraft noise, eat more ice cream, walk barefoot. Live well, laugh often, love much.

37.     Disappointments come from unmet expectations - as Sammy would always tell me - and from interpretations, anticipations, expectations and the unwillingness to embrace change.

38.     Don't sweat the small stuff.  The happiness of my life depends on the quality of my thoughts. 

39.     Look at the glass half full rather than half empty.  Turn the negative into positive.

40.     Everything happens for a reason, and to everything there is a season.

41.     In any relationship, the essence of trust is not in its bind, but in its bond. So hold the hand of the person whom you love rather than expecting them to.

42.     When you love someone, just let them know, shout it out loud…don’t wait…or that moment will just pass you by – My Bestfriend’s Wedding.

43.     Nobody can make you inferior without your consent.  Ignore those people who would pull you down a few pegs so that they'll feel superior to you. 

44.     What people think about you is none of your business and there’s nothing you can do about it.

45.     Life is not all about me.  There are far greater problems in this world than my own.

46.     All we’ve got at any given moment is what the moment holds.  Life is too short for perfection.

47.     Where you are at any given time is exactly where God wants you to be.

48.     Be prayerful.  Be thankful.  Be content.

49.     An Uncle once told me – Jan ‘03, I have noted – that he can picture me maturing into someone who would live life with happiness and pure contentment,… ho-mia, too.  I always remember his words and I want to think that I am seeing myself now the way he had pictured it. Note: whether it's true or not, it's a state of mind.

50.     Our lives are books and each day is a page. We can’t erase what has already been written but we can always try to write a better ending.

Coincident with My Obessions

 

I take my airport watching seriously.  It’s something I always do whenever I pass by it.  There’s something about the planes taking off or landing that is so hard to resist, aside from it makes me think of vacation and going home.  Three years ago I was privileged to have worked in a manufacturing company of landing gear system for aircrafts, where I get to see even a teenie bit of airplane part everyday and some awesome Airbus & Boeing launching videos.  We also live where we can hear and see airplanes every five to ten minutes, which is music to my ears now more than it is noise.  The most unexpected is that I now work in an office right across the airport, where this is what I get to see every day.

 

What a coincidence!

 

 *   *   *

 

Another thing I can’t do without is good food, good restaurant and good ambiance.  One of the very few indulgences I have, I should say, is eating out every week.  I’m glad I have a good excuse to do so and a hubby who treatss eating out as his contribution to chores, like think of it as he cooked the meal and washed the dishes. 

 

Job hunting after I graduated from university, there is only one criterion I had in mind, that is to work in a company that I like, not in terms of job description or salary, but based on the company’s products and/or services.  Although consulting firms and manufacturing companies were of big consideration, I leaned towards the food business, and luckily fell on Col. Sanders and Mr. Donut's laps.  I enjoyed doing product launching, feasilibity analyses, even the presentations, because I got to work with the executives behind my favorite finger-licking good chicken and gravy.  The frequent chicken taste-tests and the the bags of brownies I could take home occasionally were icing on the cake. 

 

And then I had this huge opportunity of putting up and managing our own hotpot restaurant, which is another favorite.

 

 

All In A Day

The alarm goes off at 6:15, I snooze a bit, then get up, make breakfast and get ready for work.  Sometimes I don’t catch Stefan anymore, or if I do, he and Sherwin send me off the door.  I leave behind my mommy hat and off I go to work.  Sherwin’s in charge of Stefan, sends him to school then go to work himself.

 

Different things happen at work, such as today I was assigned to help out in a different department, therefore had to absorb completely new information from a short training period, apply it and be sure I make no mistakes.

 

I would have only about 30minutes, that is behind the wheel, to look back on what I did for the day at work cos I was heading to pick up my son from his school, where once I get him, I would be putting my mommy hat back on. 

So the teacher told me that my son misbehaved today and he had time-out.  So driving home I was juggling my thoughts between the training I had at work and what Teacher had just told me.  But instantly when I got home, I got other things to do that I had to put these thoughts aside for the mean time.

 

I give my son snacks while I get dinner ready.  And while I chop the ingredients, I answer to his never-ending questions and look at the pictures he tries to show me and in between them have to put him on the naughty chair for more misbehaving.  With the chicken in the oven and my chayote simmering, there is a load in the dishwasher that has to be put back to the cupboard, at the same time the hubby goes up with the laundry basket, like an instant reminder that there’s some folding to do afterwards.

I become more at ease with dinner time as my son now manages to eat by himself.  Hubby helps with the cleaning up.  But I would still have to sweep the crumbs off the floor, wash the dishes, and clean up the kitchen, while father and son go for bath.  We finish about the same time.  Then we read bedtime stories alternately or together and tuck my son to bed.  Moving forward, it’s our own personal time.

 

We always make it a point to share a nightime snack as we watch TV, surf the net or go through the flyers.  And, if not forgotten, retrieve those thoughts I have set aside a while back, discuss or just vent during our rare uninterrupted chats.  Then it would be time for bed.  I would squeeze in some time for yoga/stretching while classical music plays along to release myself off the stress of my groundhog days. 

 

I look at the time.  It’s 11:00.

 

*   *   *

 

A realistic poem I read from surfing brought about by some occasional frustration why so many things have to be done and why there becomes less and less time for oneself.  If this would be some kind of consolation, it ain't that bad after all.

Hats Off to Mothers

My mommy's a nurse who fixes and patches
All of my hurts and my sores and my scratches.
My mother's a chef who fixes each dinner
Fit for a king - a blue-ribbon winner!
My mom's a chauffeur who drives pretty slow
But gets me to places where I need to go.
My mom's a detective, and no one is greater
At getting the truth from me sooner or later.
My mommy's a gardener and works really hard,
Planting and weeding and grooming our yard.
My mother's a maid - at least that's what she said -
'Cause she cleans up the house and makes every bed.
My mother's an angel - a queen in disguise -
Who teaches the gospel with tears in her eyes.
Today take these hats off, and please wear no other.
Let me do your work, to show I LOVE YOU, MOTHER!

 

 

Bei Ying

n.

 

1.  Mandarin word for the back image of a person

2.  a feeling or cause of gloom or unhappiness (that is to me)

3.  one of Ahia’s short skit in the 80’s, which also starred Mom (if you would believe)

 

While stopped at an intersection driving to work this morning, I came across a mother sending off his grade school son to the school that is diagonally across the corner where they both parted ways.  I noticed the mom watched his son cross the intersection until he disappeared off her sight.  It reminded me of the bei ying moments I had with my family.

 

When I was in Grade 2, Nat was in Grade 5.  She always stayed in my classroom until the bell rings.  She would then go to her class and would keep looking back at me.  And I would look at her until she disappeared.  We did that about everyday.

 

Everytime I would leave Taiwan after visiting Ahia & Dich, Ahia sends me to the airport.  He would stay with me until boarding and we would keep looking back at each other until either of us was gone.

 

On my family’s first visit to Canada after we migrated, we spent our last breakfast at Tim Hortons before they all went back to New Jersey.  Sherwin and I watched them drove off until their van was no longer visible.  Mom said, they also were looking back at me and Sherwin as we were walking back to our condo.  Of course, that was with matching crying a bucket of tears.

 

While we still lived in Oshawa and Sherwin worked in Oakville, I sent him to the train station everyday.  I would look at him until he got into the train, he would look until I drive away, and we would wave goodbye at each other one too many times.

 

We don’t do that anymore now.  Well… maybe just not as dramatic, because I find that everytime we both leave for work in the morning, Sherwin still waits for me to drive away a distance before he drives away in the opposite direction. 

 

You can say we have a thing for bei ying, hence the feeling of gloom it brings, because I really miss my family.  There is yet another bei ying moment waiting to happen should we meet again.

 

 "Tandang-tanda ko pa noong ikaw’y papalayo; tinitingnan kita, hanggang wala ka na."

-  Nonoy Zuniga's Kumusta Ka